Friday, October 4, 2013

getting back on track

It's been almost a year since my first and only post (so far) at noickyblogshere. What happened?

(Of course I know what happened, I lost discipline...yet again!)

Today I attempt to get back on track and join a bunch of people at #HelloMornings as we go through 21 Days To A More Disciplined Life. I read the first chapter of Crystal Paine's ebook last night and decided on two mega-projects to work on. (Two because banging my head on a wall just once doesn't seem to be enough for me.)

  • Catch up on the online course that I'm signed up for.
  • Prepare to do a 5k-run in December.
I actually had a looooooong list of mega-projects but after putting some thought into it I decided that these were the two items on my list that needed to get done. They're items that are meant to "sharpen my saw", as Stephen Covey puts it in his book The 7 Habits for Highly Effective People.

And so I have a plan! God help me in developing the discipline to see this through to the very end.

CC Image courtesy of tableatny on Flickr.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

countdown to a year older

In twelve days I will be thirty-six.


A few weeks ago I gave birth to our third daughter. After two normal deliveries, Jesse came out via an emergency caesarean procedure. It was emotional for me...and for Junjay. I remember lying on the delivery table and as they were preparing to cut me open I was started to cry. Why? Was I scared? A little bit. Was I disappointed that things were not going according to what I planned the birth to be? Maybe. Hurt because what I was going through was one big unanswered prayer? Yes, that was it.
I guess I couldn't really blame God. I haven't been what you would call faithful. But I do know that He wasn't punishing me. Maybe just teaching me a lesson. And I'd better learn the lesson so that nothing as painful as this (and I mean both physically and emotionally) will happen again.

And thirty-six is a year closer to FORTY. FORTY. I don't feel grown up enough to be approaching FORTY. I don't feel like I've done enough as a mother, a wife, a teacher, and a school administrator to be as old as I am now. But I do feel tired. Tired enough to believe that I really have lived thirty-six years on this earth. Sad, I know.

But I have to hand it to Him. I still got something special out of this roller coaster pregnancy and delivery ride.
Jesse Daniela

Isn't she beautiful? They all are.

Iya, Sary and Jesse...I must admit I was scared the two
older ones were going to squish the baby.
And I am still blessed. With a wonderful, wonderful family. I have three little girls who make me feel like I am the best person on earth (for now) even during times when I turn into "Monster Nanay". And I have a husband who is loving, accepting, and supportive even when I have messed things up.
This was taken a little past midnight on Junjay's 35th birthday.
I was still pregnant in this no judging of my weight!
So this month, it's all about gratitude. For what I have and for what is to come.